When This Passing World Is Done

When this passing world is done,

When has sunk yon glaring sun,

When we stand with Christ in glory,

Looking o'er life's finished story,

Then, Lord, shall I fully know,

Not till then, how much I owe.

When I stand before the throne, 

Dressed in beauty not my own,

When I see thee as thou art,

Love thee with unpinning heart,

Then, Lord, shall I fully know,

Not till then, how much I owe.

When the praise of heav'n I hear,

Loud as thunders to the ear,

Loud as many waters' noise,

Sweet as harp's melodious voice,

Then, Lord, shall I fully know,

Not till then, how much I owe.

Chosen not for good in me,

Wakened up from wrath to flee,

Hiddin in the Savior's side,

By the Spirit sanctified,

Teach me, Lord, on earth to show,

By my love, how much I owe.

-Robert Murray McCheyne, 1837

Why I don't do CrossFit, but still love it

I read an article today titled "Why I don't do CrossFit" that I thought I would address here. In the article, Erin Simmons speaks to the dangers of CrossFit. By and large, some of what she says is correct. There are some fundamental holes in her assessment of the CrossFit methodology though, and I will attempt to provide an alternative perspective throughout the course of this article. Before we start, let me be clear by stating that I used to do CrossFit, but have since decided to specialize in the olympic lifts. My specialization has not detracted from my love for the sport though.

Let me begin where Miss Simmons ends- "There is a sort of 'brainwashing' that occurs from the first time a person steps into a box that creates an 'us vs. them' mentality. Boxes have attempted to combat the bad reputation of CrossFit  by saying that other gyms do bad stuff but their gym is different, their coaches know good form, and their gym focuses on safety. This is simply not true, and every single thing that I've posted in this article refers to every single gym that follows CrossFit. There are no exceptions, if you're following the WODs, it's not good for you, it's not safe, and you're putting your health in danger. Take it for what it's worth, but please believe that your box is not different, no matter what your coach says."

Well, there are several things wrong with this. I won't speak for other boxes, because I am not a coach of another box. I have a Bachelor's of Science in Applied Exercise Physiology from Texas A&M University, I am a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist through the N.S.C.A, I am a certified USAW Club coach, and soon will be a Level 2 Senior National Coach. I spent a year coaching at the University of Houston, where I worked with primarily the football and track team. During that year, I had the privilege of coaching several high-level athletes, including a first round draft pick, the 2012 National Indoor 400m dash champion, and over a dozen all-americans. If all that were not enough, I sought to further my education of the CrossFit methodology by taking the Crossfit Level 1 course and CrossFit gymnastics course. I'd like to think that qualifies me to teach a few folks how to move. At my box, we run 12 week strength cycles (we've done the Hatch Cycle before) designed to increase overall strength, layered with progressive conditioning pieces (WOD's). All of our programming is online and made available to the public.

Are there gyms that do not promote safety and have no sense of programming? Absolutely! I've been to them! But to say that all gyms are bad is not only naive, but outright foolish and disrespectful of the men and women who have devoted their lives to the assessment of movement. Don't believe me? Read this article that I posted for our box back in January, after attending the CrossFit gymnastics course.

I am no fool, and I fully believe that CrossFit HQ has some issues they need to address to better the CrossFit name. Anyone who watched or participated in Open Workout 14.3 knows what I'm talking about. Here are a few.

1. High volume olympic lifts and plyometric work- these movements are high skill, and should be treated with more respect rather than bastardized "for time". Yes, they fulfill the principle of moving "large loads long distances in short times," but there is more than one way to skin a cat. Keep these movements in the skill department, not conditioning.

2. Kipping/butterfly movements- these allow athletes who do not have a requisite level of strength, scapular mobility and control, and body awareness to perform high skill movements that often put them in a compromised position where the likelihood of injury is increased.

3. Lack of programming knowledge- "random" and "constantly varied" are two very different things. Random leads to initial gains, and not much more. Constantly varied is deliberate, planned, and trackable. Think conjugate method...

4. Hero WODs- a terribly stupid idea for a terribly good cause. Can't we think of another way to remember the fallen? Something that doesn't involve destroying your body?

The list could go on, but you get the point. It seems to me that Miss Simmons got a bad taste in her mouth from her first few CrossFit experiences, which were valid, but tainted by red flag after red flag.

Red Flag #1- "... I got there and there were people attempting muscle-ups. No one was succeeding..."- 

Probably because they were not strong enough/coordinated enough to do a muscle up! Duh! They should not be attempting a high-skill, dynamic movement on a dynamic plane without first demonstrating a high level of body-control, skill, and strength. This should have been stopped and addressed by a coach.

Red Flag #2- "The workout was going to do deadlifts, which I had never done... I got less than five minutes worth of instruction before weight was piled on. Afterward, I got five minutes of instruction on 'kipping pull ups' and kettle bell swings before I was given a 35# bell..."

Well, you probably should have been a grown-up and said "no" or walked out the door. Clearly, this was not a smart, professional, well run gym. At most gyms, potential clients must first complete a 2 week on-ramp program of some sort, in which they are instructed, corrected, and required to demonstrate skills before moving on to more advanced skills. The box you visited apparently did not. After spending time in the world of collegiate athletics, I know that form was often compromised. I watched athletes use atrocious form on the olympic lifts, squats, and really everything they could get away with, and it always made me cringe. When I asked coaches why they didn't back off the weight and allow their athletes to develop proper movement mechanics, I was told "they didn't have time to teach them" and "as long as they kept getting stronger and winning ballgames it didn't matter."

As a side note, I wonder how anyone who spent 4 years in collegiate athletics, and another 4 years in high school athletics, had never done a dead-lift. As one of the core and fundamental strength building exercises, it is a staple in many strength programs. Perhaps Miss Simmons should first inquire about her previous programming before ridiculing the programming of others.

Red Flag #3- "Then the timer started. I was constantly yelled at to go faster, to take shortcuts, and to do movements from which previous injuries precluded me..."

I feel like I don't need to say much about this one. Clearly, this coach/box was below standards. The sad thing is, many are. Coaches, be knowledgable about what you are coaching, and safe in your implementation of prescribed movements.

Throughout the rest of the article, Miss Simmons continues to speak to the lowliness of CrossFit and its coaches, as well as the sophistication of the strength and conditioning world. She reminds us that CrossFit coaches can get certified in a weekend, yet I would remind you that certification does not a coach make. Coaching is an art. It is the ability to look at an individual, assess their movement, and communicate to them in a way that gets them to move their body the way you want it to move. Every collegiate strength and conditioning coach that I've ever met thinks that they know how to teach the olympic lifts because they got their USAW L1 one weekend. Seriously? The most technical movement in all of sport, and you're going to learn how to teach it in 2 days? It's laughable. Yet they teach hundreds of incoming freshmen each year, often wrongly. What's sad is that many of the coaches cannot properly perform an olympic lift themselves. The point is that all coaches, both S&C and CrossFit, are called to a high standard of knowing what they are talking about before subjecting their athletes to certain movements.

Miss Simmons reminds us that "not a single [collegiate strength and conditioning coach] recommends CrossFit. Not a single one of them has ever given me workouts that look like CrossFit WODs..." To this, I say yes, and amen. You are an athlete at the end of the spectrum. You are at the top of your respective sport, and to that end your needs are different than that of the average Joe. For you to do a CrossFit workout would likely detract from your sport-specific gains. What you must remember is that the vast majority of CrossFit clients are not collegiate athletes. They are soccer moms, bankers, lawyers, doctors, students, teachers, regular old 9-5ers looking to increase their GPP (general physical preparedness.) They don't need the specification of an elite athlete. They just want to shed a few pounds of fat, and gain a few pounds of muscle. To the client who has been a couch potato since 1995 when he graduated high school, CrossFit is a way of introducing basic strength, gymnastic, and conditioning. The result? Leaner bodies, lower blood pressures, increased VO2 maxes, and (oh my gosh) a new group of like-minded friends.

The debate about the efficacy of CrossFit has raged on for years now, and I truly do see both sides of it. The numbers don't lie: shoulder injuries have gone up, as well as (I would assume) backs and other joints. I don't deny that many of these are attributed to CrossFit, or rather an under-prepared client attempting a high-skill/high-weight maneuver under the supervision of an under-prepared coach. Here's my beef with people saying that CrossFit is dangerous, and and therefore people shouldn't do it: it is based upon the premise that anything worth doing must be safe. Truthfully, I find it a bit humorous that we spend so much time talking about rhabdo, torn shoulders, and slipped disks from CrossFit. Why? Because how many concussions does football produce each year? Yet little kids keep strapping the helmets on! How many torn ACLs does soccer produce each year? Yet people don't hesitate to strap on the shin guards. How many deaths do cars produce each year? Yet I bet you don't hesitate to get behind the wheel. Why? Because we determine that the risk is worth the reward. I'm not going to sit here and lie, my whole body hurts right now. My shoulder is tweaky, my lower back is pumped up, my knees hurt, and my shins are all torn up. And I love it. I realize that not everyone does, but I do. I would rather be banged up, bruised, limping, achy, and borderline miserable than a couch potato. When I lift, I feel alive. I have fun! The pain is worth it to me. To some, it's not, and that's okay- you don't have to spend 2 hours in the gym pounding your body each day! CrossFit is unendingly scaleable! But each individual has to decide for themselves where the line is. When someone walks in a CrossFit gym and does 21-15-9 of pull ups and thrusters, they are assuming a risk. What they are also doing is saying "hey, I know my hands are going to tear, my shoulders are going to hurt, and I may puke, but it's worth it."

To some, the risk is not worth the reward, and to the athlete who is not as gung-ho about it, I say scale! Do lighter weight, lower reps, different movements, ect. Athletes need to remember that their coach is not a dictator- they can say no. Coaches should always have an athletes safety and best interest at heart. My athletes with previous injuries do different movements! My friend Steve, who herniated a disk several years ago, does walking dumbbell lunges on days where we squat. You learn to adapt, and to work around things!

What would be best, and most beneficial, would be for both sides to glean from one another. Rather than ridiculing CrossFit and it's coaches, what if the S&C community taught boxes how to properly program and implement? What if, rather than ridicule collegiate athletes for not squatting to proper depth, knowledgeable CrossFit coaches engaged in healthy dialogue with S&C coaches about the benefits and utility of the Olympic Style Squat? The most foolish man of all is the man that thinks he has it all figured out, and everyone else is wrong. If both sides would put down their swords, they might just learn a thing or two from each other.

Blessings.

Adaptation and Progressive Overload

By now, most of you are a week deep into this program, and likely you aren't feeling too hot. I have had several of you mention to me that you feel "sore, tired, lethargic, overwhelmed, ect..." I'm sure you are beginning to wonder if you are cut out for this, or if it is too much for you. Let me assure you that you are, and that this is exactly how you are supposed to be feeling right now!

What you are experiencing is the first stage of the general adaptation syndrome. In this stage, your body is freaking out trying to figure out what this new stress (a good stress, but a stressor nonetheless) is, and it is rapidly trying to keep up. You should feel fatigued, sore, and slow. We are trying to put on muscle mass right now, so the volume is high! I know it is tempting to "take a day off so you can recover" but that is exactly what we do not want! Right now, I don't want you to be recovered when you enter the gym! If you are, you aren't training hard enough to progressively overload your body. We need to get you to the point where your body enters stage 2 of the GAS, where you start to not only survive, but thrive. This is where real gains are made!

I am a believer that there is no such thing as overtraining. "Overtraining" is simply under-recovering. You should be eating a lot- protein and carbs are your two new best friends. Learn to love them. Again, give your body a reason to grow (eat a lot!) and it will! Hydrate! Sleep!

Dig in deep. It will take a few weeks for you body to get used to. Think of it this way- when you first started crossfit, you did 10 air squats, 10 burpees, 10 pull ups, and the next day you thought you were going to die because you were so sore. In time though, your body adjusted to a point where this no longer served as a good workout, but rather a good warmup. So now you can do 10 front squats with 135, 10 burpee box jumps, and 10 bar muscle ups. Adaptation. Give the body a reason to grow, and it will.

"Absent a new stress, the body has no reason to change. You can't do the same cardio routine for 2 years and expect changes. You can't lift the same 10lb dumbbells for 5 years and expect any changes."

Strong Enough

There is an old rule of thumb in the world of weightlifting that states "if you can front squat it for 3, you can clean and jerk it." Of course, this is just a rule of thumb, and will vary from lifter to lifter depending on how efficiently they lift. I even know a few folks whose max front squat and max clean are the same. More often than not though, it is the other way around, especially in newer and less confident lifters. What I tend to see out of them is a 3RM front squat that far exceeds their max clean, and even further exceeds their max clean and jerk. So why is this?

The issue is not their strength, but rather their confidence in their strength. If they would simply trust that they are strong enough to stand it up if they would just drop under it, they would likely clean it no problem. Because of their fundamental lack of trust, which is rooted in fear, they don't drop under, and attempt to muscle it up by over-pulling. In many cases, all they need to do is put a little more faith into their legs, and let the rest work itself out.

Though I got over that fear long ago, there is another area of my life where I continue to lack faith from time to time. In placing my trust in Christ, I have made a declaration that His blood and His cross were powerful enough to cover the cost of the sins I have committed. What I have a harder time believing is that that same blood and cross are strong enough to break the chains of current sins. For me personally (and many others, I'm sure), one of the main ways this manifests itself is through addiction.

Let's face it- we're all addicted to something. For each of us it may be something different- alcohol, drugs, an adrenaline rush, acquisition of trinkets and toys, money, food, lovers, and any number of other things that brings us temporary satisfaction. But as we all know, in time the "high" that our idol brings us slowly starts to fade, leading to an ever increasing pursuit of an ever fleeting joy. Addiction is simply misplaced worship; attributing ultimate value to something that will ultimately fail you. So often, it starts by dipping your toe in the whirlpool, and before you know it you are spiraling downward, doing everything you can just to keep your head above water. Try as you might, you just can't seem to make your way back to shore. This leads to shame, depression, anxiety, and a feeling of being trapped.

In the midst of the darkness, it is easy to start believing that "this is just how it is now" and that "there's no way out." Satan, in his craftiness, wants us to believe that this is the truth, and to resign ourselves to the trappings of addiction. We must be quick to remember that the cross was not just strong enough to wash away our former sins, but to save us out of our current entanglements. We must cling to the promise that "our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin- because anyone who has died has been freed from sin" (Romans 6:6).  We must hope in his declaration that "if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you" (Romans 8:11). We must believe his promise that "the grace of God... teaches us to say 'No' to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age... while we wait for... Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good" (Titus 2:11-14). 

The God who created the heavens and the earth is powerful enough to save us out of whatever addiction we may find ourselves in. "Surely the arm of the Lord is not to short to save, nor his ear to dull to hear (Isaiah 59:1). He is good, he cares deeply for his people, and he is strong enough. We simply need to place our confidence in His strength.

Listen to how David calls out to the Lord in his time of need (excerpt from Psalm 18):

I love you, O Lord, my strength

The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer,

my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,

my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised,

and I am saved from my enemies.

The cords of death encompassed me;

the torrents of destruction assailed me;

the cords of Sheol entangled me;

the snares of death confronted me.

In my distress I called upon the Lord;

to my God I cried for help.

From his temple, he heard my voice,

and my cry to him reached his ears.

He sent from on high, he took me;

he drew me out of many waters.

He rescued me from my strong enemy

and from those who hated me,

for they were too mighty for me.

They confronted me in the day of my calamity,

but the Lord was my support. 

He brought me out into a broad place;

he rescued me, because he delighted in me.

For you save a humble people,

but the haughty eyes you bring down.

For it is you who light my lamp;

the Lord my God lightens my darkness.

For by you I can run against a troop,

and by my God I can leap over a wall.

This God- his way is perfect;

the word of the Lord proves true;

he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.

For who is God, but the Lord?

And who is a rock, except our God?-

the god who equipped me with strength

and made my way blameless.

He made my feet like the feet of a deer

and set me secure on the heights.

For this I will praise you, O Lord, among the nations,

and sing to your name.

Blessings

Not Enough

It's been a few weeks since I have posted, and in those few weeks a lot has happened. My programming is finally all coming together, and thats party because I now have a training partner that is doing the same program and is about my same strength. The extra push that we give one another has taken us both to new heights, and we have already seen several PRs.

120 kilos. It's a number that I had been chasing for over 2 years. I finally hit it, and immediately put on 125. 120 wasn't enough. I didn't end up getting 125, and though I was happy about finally getting 120, I was also a bit disappointed that I missed 125. It's funny how that works. No matter how big of a PR we hit, the joy is always short lived because of our perpetual discontent and need for more. This idea permeates every facet of our lives, especially in modern American culture.

How much is enough? This is a question that many of us must ponder as we decide what it looks like to follow Christ in today's world. Take money for example. We think that if we just got that raise, we could finally pay off those loans or get out of debt or provide for our family better. So we get the raise, and then all of a sudden we need a new car, a new house, a new suit, to go on a vacation, ect. ect. I have found that making more money only leads to spending more money. It's never enough.

This is not a new concept, but rather one that the Lord told us about thousands of years ago through Solomon:

"Whoever loves money never has enough;

whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with their income.

This too is meaningless.

As goods increase, 

so do those who consume them.

And what benefit are they to the owners

except to feast their eyes on them?

-Ecclesiastes 5:10-11

It doesn't just happen with money though. Our pursuit for more, better, bigger, fancier, shinier, more expensive, more prestigious is not confined to the financial world. Solomon elaborates on this more in Ecclesiastes 1:

"The eye is not satisfied with seeing, 

nor the ear filled with hearing."

-Ecclesiastes 1:8

In the end, nothing of this world will satisfy us. That is because "the Lord has set eternity in the human heart" (Ecclesiastes 3:11). We were not made for this world, but for the presence of the Lord, and so the things of this world- as great as they may be- will always be left wanting. They are simply "shadows of things to come; the reality is found in Christ" (Colossians 2:17). He alone will satisfy the deepest desires and wants of our hearts, and he alone will never be found lacking. In him alone is fullness of joy, freedom, and life. All the money, all the fame, all the glory in the world still is not enough to satisfy our longing hearts. My friend Brett showed me this song the other day, and it embodies this perfectly.

Blessings

See it First

I have always been a visual learner. You can talk to me about something, but until I see it, I have a hard time grasping it. This became apparent to me when I was first trying to learn the olympic lifts. I read all the articles on "how to snatch and clean" but it just made no sense to me. Then, I got on youtube and my world was changed.

It wasn't until I started watching other people lift, people who were better than me, that I understood the speed, precision, strength, and passion necessary to become a weightlifter. Sometimes it takes seeing somebody else do something before we can really understand it. Donald Miller speaks of this phenomenon:

"I never liked jazz music because jazz music doesn't resolve. But I was outside the Bagdad Theater in Portland one night when I saw a man playing the saxophone. I stood there for fifteen minutes, and he never opened his eyes.

After that, I liked jazz music.

Sometimes you have to watch somebody love something before you can love it yourself. It is as if they are showing you the way."

If we're honest, the love of God is a hard thing to grasp. We hear it preached from the pulpit every Sunday morning, and we are engrained with phrases such as "God is love". That's great and all, but for those of us who are visual learners, it sometimes takes something more physical and tangible for us to truly begin to understand the depth of His unconditional, unfailing love. For me, one such moment happened the other night as I unfolded the story of my life to my best friend. All my shortcomings, all my failures, all my trials and mistakes were laid on the table. It was a vulnerable place, one- if I'm honest- I was not to thrilled to be in. She could have walked out, and she could have told me what a screw-up and failure I was, but instead she offered grace, love, support, and forgiveness to me. It was humbling to think how undeserving I was of that kind of love- a love that is not based on condition or merit, but a love that stands by you even when you are at your worst. In her love for me, I was given the clearest of pictures of the Lord's unending, unfailing, unquenchable love for his people. It is a love that is redemptive. It is a love that brings freedom and joy. It is a love that you can be thankful for on the good days, and a love you can cling to when your life seems to be falling a part. It's a love that I had heard about plenty of times, but until I experienced it firsthand, I couldn't get my mind around it.

Sometimes we have to see it first before we can grasp it. Maybe you will be the one to show someone else. In either case, it brings me joy knowing that the Lord's love is real, steadfast, and pure.

"This is how God showed his love among us: he sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us... And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgement, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us." -1 John 4:9-12, 16-19

Blessings.

Move On

Sometimes, things don't all go according to plan. You can put in all the time, work, discipline, and effort, and things still don't pan out like you want them to. Failure is a perpetual occurrence in the world of weightlifting and CrossFit. In these moments, we have a choice- to get frustrated and quit, or to roll with the punches, learn from failure, and move on. For me, I seem to be able to do this pretty well in the gym (maybe it's because I fail so often that I have learned to move on quickly). What is much more difficult is releasing myself from failure and moving on when I fail in life.

Failure is something we all must deal with. Maybe it's failing a test. Maybe it's missing a deadline. Maybe it's feeling like we are failing in a relationship. Perhaps we feel like failures with our job, or our kids, or worst of all our pursuit of Christ. A friend of mine once wrote in a letter to me something that stuck with me:

"There is no failure in the eyes of our Maker as long as we do not forsake Him in the midst of it." -J. Smith

It is in these moments of failure that we are refined, that we are sharpened, and that we are humbly reminded of our imperfections and need for someone greater to justify us. How glorious it is that we have such a man- Jesus, the Christ, our King. In Him, all my failures- past, present, and future- are washed away by His blood (Revelation 1:5). In Him, I have freedom (Galatians 5:1). In Him, there is no condemnation (Romans 8:1). When we hold on to our failures, and when we fixate our eyes on them rather than releasing them and moving on, we are holding on to something that Christ has already paid for, and in doing so revealing a lack of trust in the fact that His payment on the cross was enough. But thanks be to God that it was enough! Trust His promise- that when He said "it is finished," He meant it.

Hold fast brothers and sisters. Blessings.

The Reward of Waiting on what is Promised

By now, I'm sure most of you have a general idea of the flow of this blog. I typically start by talking about olympic style weightlifting, or CrossFit, then transition into something spiritual that has been on my mind or that the Lord has been teaching me, then move into how that applies to our daily lives.  Today, as much as I tried, I just didn't have anything to talk about when it comes to fitness, but much to say in regards to the life that Christ calls us to live.

The book of Genesis is filled with stories of how different men related to God. Some were faithful, others were evil, some found favor, while others found wrath. One such man was Abraham, the forefather of the nation of Israel. I will attempt to be brief, but a little background story is needed for context.

In chapter 11 of Genesis, we see men's desire for security ("let us build a city... lest we be dispersed" (11:4)) and praise ("let us build a tower with its tops in the heavens... that we might make a name for ourselves" (11:4)) lead to their demise when they build the Tower of Babel. Laid across this backdrop, Abram (later to be renamed Abraham) enters the picture in chapter 12. The Lord calls him to leave behind all that makes him secure, saying, "Go from your country and your kindred and your father's house..." (12:1). He goes on to promise Abram that he will "bless you and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing... and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed" (12:2-3).

Abram trusted the Lord, and had faith that he would deliver on his promise, even if it forced him to be uncomfortable. He left his homeland in search of a new home. Long story short, his nephew Lot was taken captive by an alliance of four kings who invade the Jordan Valley. When Abram got word of this, he marshaled a small force and went to battle against the kings, setting the captives free. Proving his military prowess, Abram could have gone on to conquer lands of his own, securing possessions, servants, and power. The possibility must have seemed tempting, especially when in chapter 14 the king of Sodom offered him to "take all the goods for yourself" (v. 21). Rather than succumb to the fleeting pleasures of the world, Abram denied himself of man's praise, choosing instead to wait on the promised reward from the Lord. "

But Abram said to the king of Sodom, "I have lifted my hand to the Lord, God Most High, Possessor of heaven and earth, that I would not take a thread or a sandal strap or anything that is yours, lest you should say, 'I have made Abram rich.'..." (13:22-23)

His faith was rewarded, and in chapter 15 the Lord reaffirms his promise to Abram, saying, "Fear not, Abram, I am your shield; your reward shall be very great" (15:1). By rejecting the use of human wealth to achieve greatness, Abram demonstrated his willingness to wait for God to provide. Faith in God was something everyone in the Bible was expected to exercise. It entails trust in or confident reliance on God, based on the truthfulness of his words, and it will lead to obeying his commands.

As I reflected on this story, I couldn't help but think how difficult it can be to trust in and wait on the Lord sometimes. We want a sign, we want him to just come out and speak to us, but often times it just doesn't work like that. I suppose that's the whole point of faith- "being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" (Hebrews 11:1). Faith often requires us to be uncomfortable- to step outside of our comfort zone like Abram did when he left his homeland; to not seek man's praise, but the Lord's like Abram did when he refused to conquer other lands; to trust that when the Lord says he will do something, he will do it.

It would have been easy for Abram to not exhibit faith, and to do things on his own, to desire his own glory, to seek his own security. It would be just as easy for us to do the same; to not wait on the Lord when searching for a husband/wife, but just find someone who is pretty; to not give back to the Lord when finances get tight, but instead hoard all of your resources; to not trust him when he says that he is after our joy, and that his rules are for our good and his glory, but instead to seek after the fleeting pleasures of this world- sex, wine, power, money, fame. Faith requires much of us- trust, patience, steadfastness. But it is worth it, brothers. There is much reward for those who wait on the Lord.

Here are a few promises of the Lord that we are to claim, hope in, and wait for:

Matthew 11:28-29
Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Isaiah 40:29-31
He gives power to the weak
and strength to the powerless. 
Even youths will become weak and tired,
and young men will fall in exhaustion. 
But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.
They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
They will walk and not faint.

Philippians 4:19
And the same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which has been given to us in Christ Jesus.

Proverbs 1:33
But all who listen to me will live in peace,
untroubled by fear or harm

Exodus 14:14
The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be silent.

John 14:27
I am leaving you with a gift- peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid.

Romans 10:9
If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord ,and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.

Blessings.

Unearned

I have been chasing after the mythical 4 plate squat for about 2 years now. I have tried it several times before, never with success. Through months (and months and months and months...) of hard work, I finally was able to squat it... for a double!

One of the things I love most about weightlifting and CrossFit is that they are very objective in the way you are rewarded. What I mean is that one way or another, hard work always pays off. It really is quite simple: if I work hard enough, and if I consistently give effort and do the things that I don't necessarily want to do (squat...), then I will reap the reward of my labor. The more dedication, focus, and effort I put into the work, the sweeter and more bountiful the fruit I yield. It is quite linear, and makes sense in my head, and that's what I like about it. You put in hard work, you get out results.

What is more difficult for me to understand is the way in which the Lord freely gives out His grace. In my head, what would make sense is a typical "if-then" situation: if I do good things, and if I try hard enough, then the Lord will give me grace. I operated out of this understanding of the dispensation of grace for the first 18 years of my life. It drove me to the point of attempting to become my own savior, leading to much frustration and guilt, and a perpetual feeling that I wasn't doing enough (probably because I wasn't!). I remember quite vividly the moment when that all changed- I was a senior in high school, and someone sat me down and explained to me that the Lord didn't love me because of the things I had to offer him, and that all of my works amounted to nothing before Him, but that His favor toward me was based not off of what I had done but rather what Christ had done. How free I felt in knowing that I no longer had to earn, but simply rest in the grace that was freely given to me. That though I had put in sin, rebellion, and disobedience, when I put my trust in Christ I got out grace.

Though I know this to be true of the Lord, and of His Gospel of Grace, I still oftentimes find my heart operating out of my former understanding. My guess is that many of you feel the same. Though we know and trust that Jesus died for all of our former sins, we still feel the need to atone for our current sins, as if His cross was not powerful enough. What we must cling to with unwavering faith is the reality that all of our sins, past, present, and future, were nailed to the cross, and that when He said, "it is finished" (John 19:30), He meant it. We can never hope to be our own savior, but must instead place our hope in the true Savior, Jesus our King. Remember what the apostle Paul said: "And if by grace, then it cannot be based on works; if it were, grace would no longer be grace" (Romans 11:6). Grace is unearned!

A favorite poem of mine, written by 18th century revivalist John Berridge, portrays this beautifully:

"Run, John, and work", the law commands,

yet gives me neither feet nor hands,

But sweeter news the gospel brings,

it bids me "fly" and gives me wings!

Blessings.

Beauty in Pain

Yesterday may have been one of the heaviest and most difficult training days of my life. I recently increased my working weight on my squats, and after working to a max snatch and max clean & jerk, I was not super excited about 4x3 squats at 90% (which was my old 95%) followed by heavy pulls at 110%. I hit a 3RM PR, then had to do it three more times. To be honest, my body was starting to fail me. Before each set, I had to recite Psalm 73:26 in my head over and over again- "my flesh and my heart may fail, but the Lord is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." This helped me remember that my body has limits, and will eventually fail me, but the Lord is limitless and will never fail me. What also drove me was knowing that there is beauty in pain- often, the more severe the pain, the more severe the beauty. Let me explain.

I have to be honest, heavy back squats are not exactly my favorite. In fact, neither are light ones. I constantly find myself asking the question, "Why are you doing this?" Why do I undergo the sore knees? Why do I go through the moments where I want to puke? Why do I endure all of the pain that comes with going under the bar? The answer is simple- hope. Hope that going heavy makes me stronger. Hope that doing one extra rep will help me lift more in the future. Hope that the reward will bring me joy. What makes the pain worth enduring is the hope, and the knowledge that in the midst of the pain there is beauty. It's a beautiful thing that I can move, that I can squat, that I can persevere, that I can endure. It hurts, and it's not fun in the moment, but lifting our eyes allows us to see with perspective.

Life is full of these painful moments. We've all been there- losing a loved one, going through a break up, having to hear some news that is difficult to swallow. These moments bring us to our knees, fill our eyes with tears, and stab our hearts with pain. Our head swims with questions: Why? What is God doing? How could this happen? But what helps us endure is hope. Hope that our God is good, that He is for us and always has our best interests at heart, and that His love for us is deep and unending. Hope that our pain will sanctify us, and make us more like Christ. Hope that one day, "every tear will be wiped away" (Rev 21:4). One the most raw, grief-stricken, and beautiful passages of scripture lays out for us both the depths of pain and the heights of God's love-

"I am the man who has seen affliction, 

under the rod of his wrath; 

he has driven and brought me

into darkness without any light; 

surely against me he turns his hand

again and again the whole day long.

He has made my flesh and my skin waste away;

he has broken my bones; 

he has besieged and enveloped me

with bitterness and tribulation;

he has made me dwell in darkness

like the dead of long ago.

He has walled me about so that I cannot escape;

he has made my chains heavy;

though I call and cry for help,

he shuts out my prayer;

he has blocked my ways with blocks of stones;

he has made my paths crooked.

He is a bear lying in wait for me,

a lion in hiding;

he turned aside my steps and tore me to pieces;

he has made me desolate;

he bent his bow and set me

as a target for his arrow.

He drove into my kidneys

the arrows of his quiver;

I have become the laughingstock of all peoples,

the object of their taunts all day long.

He has filled me with bitterness;

he has sated me with wormwood.

He has made my teeth grind on gravel,

and made me cower in ashes;

my soul is bereft of peace;

I have forgotten what happiness is;

so I say, 'My endurance has perished;

So has my hope from the Lord.'

Remember my affliction and my wanderings,

the wormwood and the gall!

My soul continually remembers it

and is bowed down within me.

But this I call to mind, 

and therefore I have hope:

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;

His mercies never come to an end;

they are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

'The Lord is my portion,' says my soul,

'therefore I will hope in Him."

The Lord is good to those who wait for him,

to the soul who seeks him.

It is good that one should wait quietly

for the salvation of the Lord.

It is good for a man that he bear

the yoke in his youth.

Let him sit alone in silence

when it is laid on him;

let him put his mouth in the dust-

there may yet be hope;

let him give his cheek to the one who strikes,

and let him be filled with insults.

For the Lord will not

cast off forever,

but, though he caused grief, he will have compassion

according to the abundance of His steadfast love;

for he does not afflict from his heart

or grieve the children of men."

-Lamentations 3:1-33

There is coming a day when all pain comes to an end, when every problem is solved, when every tear is wiped away. Until that day, we endure the troubles of this world in hope that one day Christ will make all things new. Until he does, we are to seek beauty in the midst of pain- that despite our hurting hearts we can still love,  and that the pain is a reminder to us that all is not as it should be, but that our King will sustain us, bring joy to our hearts, and bear our burdens.

Blessings.

Devil in a Red Dress

Training isn't always easy. In fact, most days it's extremely difficult. Most beginners PR every day, and every day is a new experience filled with joy and rainbows. Anyone who has been a weightlifter for any serious amount of time knows that you don't PR every day, and most days are a serious struggle. I feel like every morning, while I am lying in bed, I wonder how the heck I am every going to lift a weight. "I'm tired, I'm sore, I feel like crap, I feel like a 600 pound gorilla beat me up in my sleep last night." These are the thoughts running trough my head. "Maybe today is a good day for a rest day..." is the tempting phrase that runs through my head.

One of the weightlifters I respect and admire the most, Jon North, refers to this phenomenon as The Devil in a Red Dress. She is the beautiful devil that tempts you to quit, to take it easy, to take a day off. She is the warm bed, the promise of pain free muscles, the hope of un-achy joints. But she is empty promises. She is deceptive. She is misleading. If you trust her, you will not take two steps forward, but two steps back. This is a reality and an experience every serious weightlifter will undergo. When you train hard, your body pays a price, and often times we think that means we are doing something wrong. "I must be overtraining. My programming must be too hard. I must be doing too much volume, or too much or intensity, or both. I must be doing something wrong." Lies! When your body hurts the most, you must beat it into submission without refrain. You must trust your coach. You must trust the program. And you must persevere.

There have been many times that I have considered quitting, or just doing weightlifting recreationally. My doubts and insecurities are not just limited to the platform though- I often feel that same way sitting in the pew on Sunday mornings. For the Christian, not every day is a mountaintop experience. For me, it seems from time to time I experience seasons of spiritual dryness. In these seasons, I feel that no matter what I am doing, I haven't done enough to earn God's love, and as a result I am not feeling his presence. My time in the word is dry, my prayers seem to just bounce off the ceiling, and I don't feel any joy in worship. "I must be doing something wrong." St. John of the Cross, a Roman Catholic Saint of the 16th century, wrote a poem entitled The Dark Night of the Soul in which he identifies the causes, and the benefits of such time:

"Souls begin to enter this dark night when God, gradually drawing them out of the state of beginners (those who practice meditation on the spiritual road), begins to place them in the state of proficients (those who are already contemplatives), so that by passing through tis state they might reach that of the perfect, which is the divine union of the soul with God."

"He leaves them in such dryness that they not only fail to receive satisfaction and pleasure from their spiritual exercises and works, as they formerly did, but also find these exercises distasteful and bitter."

"This glad night and purgation causes many benefits even though to the soul it seemingly deprives it of them."

"The first and chief benefit this dry and dark night of contemplation causes is the knowledge of self and one's own misery. Besides the fact that all the favors of God imparts to the should are ordinarily wrapped in this knowledge, the aridities and and voids of the faculties in relation to the abundance previously experienced and the difficulty encountered in this practice of virtue make the soul recognize its own lowliness and misery, which was not apparent in the time of its prosperity." 

"As a result the soul recognizes the truth about its misery, of which it was formerly ignorant. When it was waling in festivity, gratification, consolation, and support in God, it was more content, believing that it was serving God in some way... Now that the soul is clothed in these other garments of labor, dryness, and desolation, and its former lights have been darkened, it possesses more authentic lights in this most excellent and necessary virtue of self-knowledge. It considers itself to be nothing and finds no satisfaction in self because it is aware that of itself it neither does nor can do anything."

Struggles are evidence of our sanctification, our passing from "beginners" to "proficients". Dryness is God's way of making us seek Him more deeply, and thus being rewarded with a more intimate and life giving relationship with him. The Devil in a red dress wants us to believe that we aren't good enough, that we will never be enough to please God, and that He is withholding His presence from us forever. But thanks be to God that "while we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8). We must trust God when He says he "will take great delight in us and rejoice over us with singing" (Zephaniah 3:17).

Hold fast brothers, persevere, and trust in His love. Blessings

Reminders

Youtube has become a bit of a reality checker for me. I would like to think that I am strong and good at weightlifting, but all it takes is 10 minutes searching around on Youtube for me to be reminded that there are 13 year olds that are 4 weight classes below me that out-lift me. Point and case: CJ Cummings-

Reminders are good. They give us perspective and keep us grounded. One really cool reminder that I just learned of happens in 1 Samuel 21. David is on the run from Saul, and is tired and hungry from fleeing his pursuer. He comes across a priest, and asks for some bread. The priest, Ahimelech, tells David that the only bread he has left is the "bread of the presence." This bread was meant to be placed before the Lord as a reminder to Him of his everlasting covenant to fellowship with His people. On this day, however, the Lord used this bread as reminder to David.

How fitting is it that when David needed it the most, the Lord reminded him of His constant presence by providing David with sustenance through the bread of the presence. The Lord is intentional in all his ways, and likes to speak directly to our hearts, fears, and anxieties. In providing David with this specific bread, not only did he feed his immediate need (hunger) but provided him with a reminder that would feed his ongoing need- the need for David to trust Him in all things, especially turing this time of turmoil.

It would serve us well to be reminded of the many things we have to be thankful for- jobs, families, friends, houses, cars, clothes, food, joy, unneeded luxuries, many other things, but most of all our freedom from sin in Christ. He is the "bread of life" (John 6:36) who is our reminder of God's presence in our lives. He is our great High Priest, who's scars are laid before God moment by moment, reminding Him that our debt has been paid in full. 

Just a thought. Blessings

Sharpening

"Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses." -Proverbs 27:5-6

As much as I hate it, having a good pair of eyes to coach you is something that I have found to be invaluable as an athlete. Most times, I tend to train alone, but I have been blessed enough in my time as a weightlifter to have several other guys to sharpen me in my attempts to lift more weights. Guys like Steve, Kyle, Matt, Jordan, and Josh have all made me a better lifter in several ways. When I watch them, it inspires and pushes me to be better, but they also are able to watch me and tell me what I am doing wrong. I often feel as if I am doing everything right, but as you can see from the video above, that simply isn't true. What I have found is that when these brothers tell me to change something, like to keep my weight back or to not smack the bar horizontally, there is initially some defensiveness that arises in my heart. This is due to my pride, the feeling that I am right and they are wrong. The fact of the matter is, though, that if the bar doesn't end up overhead, then I have done something wrong and need to humble myself enough to let others help. It would be easy to surround myself with people who do nothing but pat me on the back and tell me how awesome I am, but much harder to surround myself with critical thinkers who will challenge me and not let me get away with things I should not be doing. As with most things, the easy route is not the most rewarding route.

Weightlifting and my spiritual life continue to run parallel, and this concept holds true for the topic at hand as well. As humans, we tend to think the best of ourselves at all times, often to our own demise. I may give myself the benefit of the doubt, but others tend to see us for who we really are, and praise God when a brother or sister is bold enough to confront you about it. I had a conversation this week with my brother Chase that got me thinking about this. Chase and I lived together through college, and shared a room for two of those years. He may know me better than just about anyone in the world, and as much as I hate to admit it he sometimes even knows me and the motivations of my heart better than I do. As we were talking on the phone, he brought up some things in my life for me to question, and I immediately felt attacked and defensive. He sensed this, and apologized, but when the dust settled and I objectively thought about it, I realized that he was right about a few things. Due to my pride, I felt that I was right and he was wrong. We need others to sharpen us, to reveal to us where we have gone astray, and to point us back to Christ. The bible speaks of the blessings of friendship on multiple occasions:

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!" -Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Surround yourself with those who will push you to be better at your craft, and will challenge you to grow deeper in your affections for the King. It's hard, and sharpening hurts, but its worth it- there is beauty in pain. Blessings.

Familiar

One of the things I appreciate most about the barbell (or more generally crossfit/olympic lifting) is how familiar it has become to me. It doesn't matter where you go, the barbell is always the same. I have lifted in many cities in states, I have lifted when all is well and when all seems to be crumbling around me, I've lifted alone and with large groups, and the one thing that remains consistent is the barbell. I love that no matter what is going on in the world, it always feels the same in my hands or on my shoulders. The barbell doesn't care what kind of day you have been having, all that he cares about is that you pick him up. And inevitably, when I do the feel of the knurl in my palms makes all the troubles of the world seem to fade away. Because of its familiarity, it provides me with comfort and stability.

I was blessed this weekend to get to spend time around three of the people I love the most, one of whom was a brother that I lived with through college. When we graduated, Brett moved off to Maryland with his new bride Melissa, and he has been there for the past two years. Though we only get to talk about once a month, each time we reunite it is as if no time has passed. I was reminded of that this weekend- 30 seconds after he picked me up, we were already deep in conversation. I suppose when you share a room with someone for two years, you become pretty well acquainted with them (for better or for worse). It truly is a sanctifying experience, and creates a bond like no other. Brett, along with several other brothers, has been a rock of comfort and stability in my life because of the brotherhood we share, the bond we have in Christ, and because of our familiarity. It doesn't matter what kind of circumstances I am going through, I know I can always count on him to love me just the same. I was encouraged in spending time with him to grow in my affections for Christ, I was proud to get to watch him baptize his bride, and I am just proud of him in general at the man he has become- a "man after God's own heart." 

In spending time with Brett, Melissa, and Jessica this weekend, I was reminded of the ultimate stability and comfort that we have in Christ our King- that no matter where we are or what we do, no matter what is going on in our lives, through the highest of highs and the lowest of lows, Jesus is always right there with us, loving us through every situation. Joseph Scriven penned the following hymn, which describes this quite well:

"What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!

What a privelege to carry everything to God in prayer!

Can we find a friend so faithful, who will all our sorrows share?

Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care? 

Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.

Do your friends despise, forsake you? Take it to the Lord in prayer!

In His arms He'll take and shield you; you will find a solace there.

Soon in glory bright unclouded, there will be no need for prayer,

 Rapture, praise and endless worship will be our sweet portion there."

Grabbing coffee and a cupcake... carb loading!

A bit dark and blurry, but visiting ol' Abe

Dead to sin, alive in Christ...

Raised to walk in the newness of life!

Bell tower

Biking through DC!

The capital building

Sunsets and monuments

"For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." - Romans 8:38-39

Shared Joy

I have discovered something about myself over the course of the past few months. There are a lot of things that I love about crossfit and weightlifting: the community, the results, the fun, and so much more. What I think I love most though is the journey- the day in, day out grind and struggle to make yourself better than you were the day before. Nothing is more rewarding than taking a step back and seeing how far you have come in a set amount of time. I remember when my max clean and jerk was 100 kilos- what is now a warm up snatch weight. It is in stepping back that you realize all the blood, sweat, and tears (yes, men cry... lifting heavy weights day in and day out will do that to you eventually. If it doesn't, you aren't lifting heavy enough) are worth it. I have found that for me personally, the climax of each segment of my journey is in sending a PR video to my close friends and lifting partners. The first thing I do when I hit a PR is text the handful of people who would appreciate not only the PR, but the journey I have taken to achieve it. I was thinking about this yesterday, and a question began circulating in my head.

Why do you feel the need to share the video with them?

The answer is two fold: 1) for their good/joy, and 2) for my good/joy

In my sharing the video, they stand to learn a thing or two from what I did right, as well as what I did wrong. This, when applied personally, leads to them improving and thus receiving more joy. I also stand to gain joy from this experience, for my joy is not consummated until it is shared. I love weightlifting, and if I were never to talk about it or share it with others, it would probably mean that I either didn't love it as much as I say I do, or that I was missing out on experiencing some of the joy it had to offer by keeping it to myself and not sharing it with others. How true it is that until we share our enjoyment of something, we have not yet received the fullness of joy that is to be had in that something.

I can't help but think how applicable this is in regards to the gospel message of Christ taking what was broken and making it new.

"If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation, that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake, he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God."
-2 Corinthians 5:16-18

That I am a new creation, made whole and clean by Christ my King is more precious than any weight I will ever lift over my head. It is a gift to marvelous for words, to amazing for comprehension, and to delightful to not share. If I didn't share my love for Christ with others, it would either mean that I didn't love Him as much as I said I did, or that I was missing out on some of the joy that was to be had by keeping it to myself. Our enjoyment of the gospel message is inseparably linked to our sharing of that gospel message- our joy is not yet consummated until it is shared. The words of the prophet Jeremiah come to mind:

"But if I say, 'I will not mention his word or speak anymore in his name', his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot." (Jer 20:9)

So herald the good news, brothers and sisters, for His glory, and for your good. The kingdom is at stake, as is your joy!

Blessings